What everybody must understand before reading this is how much I love Ben Affleck. I loved him as the skinny star in Kevin Smith movies, I loved him taking on the romantic hero in â€œPearl Harborâ€ and I even loved him when he wielded that macho paddle in â€œDazed and Confused.â€ Â â€œGood Will Huntingâ€ and â€œArgoâ€ are absolute masterpieces and Bennifer are a modern-day Romeo and Juliet. However, this good-looking, intelligent, 10-out-of-10 sun god needs to step back and reevaluate his life before he thinks he can get away with replacing a modern-day icon: Batman.
Hereâ€™s the thing: Ben Affleck is a bad actor. Â Heâ€™s a beautiful, chiseled fool who doesnâ€™t know how to read lines off paper the way good actors can. Â Of course, heâ€™s an amazing writer and acts all right in his own movies, but the moment itâ€™s somebody elseâ€™s script, his skills go out the window. Watching him on-screen is like watching a gorgeous cardboard box being pointed at a camera. Â Again, I loved movies â€œArgoâ€ and â€œGood Will Hunting,â€ but Affleckâ€™s acting has absolutely nothing to do with their critical acclaim. Â Theyâ€™d probably be better films if their casting had been reconsidered and actors with real skill (like, I donâ€™t know, Christian Bale?) had been given the roles instead.
If we want to make a true prediction of Baleâ€™s performance, the best thing we can do is compare it to another similar role of his. Unfortunately, that would mean seeing him in â€œDaredevil,â€ which is arguably the worst movie ever made. Â It was painfully written, directed and, worst of all, performed. Â I think he thought he could get away with putting on a tight spandex suit and crossing his eyes for 90 minutes, but nobody else in the entire universe agrees. Â And, if he canâ€™t even be a superhero like Daredevil, how can he be expected to carry the emotional baggage that Batman does? Â Itâ€™ll be like cardboard trying to play wallpaper.
And, while Ben is beautiful as a man, Iâ€™m 100 percent sure heâ€™d be 20 times more beautiful as a woman. Â Heâ€™s got big doe eyes, cherry-red lips and a gently curved jaw-line. Â Iâ€™d gladly get into a fight with that androgynous child simply to slip some of the lavender-scented hand lotion out of his pocket (because how else could he look so soft and sweet-smelling?). Â At this point, Batman is supposed to look rugged and wise, not gentle and cherubic. Â Iâ€™m not completely convinced that this man can even grow facial hair, so I wonâ€™t believe that this infant is the dark savior of Gotham City. Â How will the criminals feel? Theyâ€™re going to laugh at him. Â Iâ€™m going to laugh at him. Â Itâ€™s going to be a disgrace.
I understand that I might be mistaken and Ben Affleck could reinvent his entire image and skill level, but I highly doubt it. Â Either way, the movie will be a terrible disaster, so everyone should go see it anyway.