This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here
Famous YouTuber and philanthropist Mr. Beast announced his plans on X this weekend to create a new series titled “Unfeastable Games.” The reality competition show will be based on the recent release of “Sunrise on the Reaping” and is currently searching for potential contestants to compete for a cash prize of $10 million.
“Sunrise on the Reaping” is the newest installment of Suzanne Collins’ “The Hunger Games,” a popular young adult series that criticizes the overindulgence of wealth and sensationalism of violence. To best emulate the novels, Beast will be spending $200 million to build an accurate arena and hire multiple celebrities to portray Capitol citizens.
“I’m trying to learn from my mistakes after ‘The Beast Games.’ People said they didn’t like the games, so I’m basing my next project on a series known for its popular game,” Beast said. “Another criticism was the conditions being lackluster for our contestants, and so we decided to double our budget for the set.”
To start the process for the games, Beast is selecting tributes, I mean … contestants for the games through a “reaping,” which will be streamed on YouTube live along with a giveaway for Beast merchandise. Since Beast can’t choose actual children for the reality show due to stupid laws, he’s instead looking for college-age students to submit their names to be put into the reaping pool and be chosen for tribute. If students wish to put their name into the reaping pool multiple times, all they have to do is buy Beast merchandise and enter the code that comes with it online to add their name again. Students may add their name as many times as they wish.
“We knew it would be wrong to include children in our show, as the conditions are going to be pretty dangerous, and we can’t guarantee everyone’s going to survive … I mean win,” Beast said. “That’s why we’re looking at college students. They’re broke, hungry and willing to fight each other to the death … sorry, I meant for money.”
“I am disappointed that ‘The Unfeastable Games’ can’t be totally realistic to the original and have people fight to the death,” Beast said. “It feels inauthentic, especially when the original did such a great job making the tributes’ deaths feel so real and powerful.”
Beast plans to honor the original work he’s basing “Unfeastable Games” off of by making the Capitol look as real as possible and replicating the fashion, as well as the traps and dangers of the original arena. When asked if he consulted Suzanne Collins for how she would recommend interpreting “The Hunger Games” series, he replied, “Who’s that?”
The reaping process begins in two weeks, and all Trinity students are eligible to place their name in the reaping. Professor Sando will be hosting a watch party for any interested students after his lecture on how dystopia reflects reality.
