Long ago, on a 125-acre campus in downtown San Antonio, two Tigers fell in love. Bound together by shared bonds, deep connections and devoted friendship, Jon and Tenley French reflected on their time at Trinity and their love story from 31 years ago.
Over 1,000 miles apart, Jon grew up in Missouri and Tenley was raised in El Paso, Texas. The two had different reasons for attending Trinity. Jon said he was drawn to Trinity’s strong reputation, dedication to the scientific field, the opportunity to traverse Texas and the San Antonio culture and its competitive scholarships, which awarded him a full ride. As for Tenley, she was looking to get out of El Paso and take on a new change of scenery.
Bustling with dining orders and peer-to-peer conversations, the Coates Student Center has become a hub for social gatherings. Within this space of community, Jon and Tenley met for the first time.
“We have a very strong memory that we like to highlight with our kids,” Tenley said. “Jon was sitting and having lunch outside the Coates Center, and I was coming out with this friend, her name was Jackie, and she ran into Jon and she introduced us. We started doing a lot together and then started dating in our second semester of freshman year.”
From that moment on, the two started to build their own share of memories. In their first semester at Trinity, Jon and Tenley recalled the time they spent together before they dated. From outdoor recreational activities to shared hobbies, the pair navigated their first year with quality time and deep conversation.
“We were having a conversation on the stairway, even before we started dating, and we both told each other that we could picture being together the rest of our lives,” Jon said. “At that point, it was really just based on how connected we were from a friendship perspective more than romantic.”
However, this relationship did not come without a cost. Amidst a choice of commitment came the tradeoff of other individual relationships.
“For couples that are very committed to each other during university, there is a consequence because there are individual relationships and friendships that you might have had more time for,” Jon said. “I think our sophomore year, especially, our personal friendships with other people, waned a little bit. But in our junior or senior year, that started to come back as we matured and grew a bit more confident about our own relationship so that we could then turn towards others and start to develop that again.”
Jon and Tenley can still recount key pillars of their life together that affected their own personal development. In college, they motivated each other to try new things they had never done before, Tenley said.
“Each of us rubbed off on the other. I did not have an experience with — or culture of — going out to clubs and dancing and getting dressed up,” Jon said. “I also really appreciated being a part of her family. Every family is different, and so as I got to know Tenley’s sister and parents, it allowed me to grow in my understanding of what a family could be.”
More than three decades later, the couple shared what their journey has been like post-graduation. According to the pair, parenting their three children, being life partners and playing house has only brought them closer.
“I love how much Tenley is still constantly changing and growing. She is not stagnant at all. Her character continues to build. Her fun and lovingness as a partner continues to grow,” Jon said. “We continue to find new and interesting things to do and talk about with each other. I also think that we continue to strike a better and better balance related to both our relationship with each other and our relationship with friends and with our community.”
Tenley said the two are cohesive in how they approach life. “It’s nice to have a life partner that you have many similarities with, but I’d say almost more importantly, I love spending time with Jon. He makes me laugh, which is wonderful.”
As Valentine’s Day approaches, this year the Frenches will be skipping the roses. They’ll be on a ski slope instead — 31 years in, still moving.
