This piece is entirely satirical as a part our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian.
The Dodgers took a chance this offseason and signed former Los Angeles Angel Shohei Ohtani for a ten-year, $700 million deal, but his recent gambling scandal involving his interpreter has sparked concern across the globe. Fans, teammates, journalists, and MLB staff have all questioned the extent of Ohtani’s involvement with his sports gambling scandal, with some attaching him to the Los Angeles mob.
Within the past few years, Shohei Ohtani has been the number-one baseball phenomenon due to his unique ability to down a monstrous amount of hot dogs in one sitting.
“Simply put, Ohtani is the first MLB player who can drink 15 beers in under an hour, put away several dozen hot dogs, smoke six cigars, and then hit the town since Ruth was in his prime,” sports journalist Callum Berg said.
Over a week ago, news surrounding Ohtani’s interpreter, Ippei Mizuhara, broke the internet when it was announced that Mizuhara had stolen money and gone over $4.5 million in debt due to sports gambling. Fans have raised eyebrows at Ohtani, with the belief that his interpreter is a coverup for a secret sports gambling addiction. A recent rumor spread has taken over social media accusing Ohtani of engaging with the Los Angeles Ferrico mob.
“It makes me happy that Ohtani is a gambler like us,” Los Angeles resident Howard Ratner said. “I don’t buy the interpreter story, it doesn’t add up. Shohei’s interpreter was simply expressing his loyalty. He’s definitely involved with the Ferricos; I saw an episode of the Sopranos once and it reminded me of this scandal. All I wish is that he didn’t lie about it. At this point, he needs to own up to his addiction.”
Despite this controversy, Shohei has the league’s trust and protection due to his value. MLB commissioner Bob Manfreed has responded to the incident with full loyalty to Ohtani, pledging his commitment against popular belief.
“After our investigation on the scandal, we can confirm Ohtani has had absolutely no involvement with sports gambling,” Manfreed said. “Shohei has shown nothing but honesty and respect to both the Angels and Dodgers’ organizations. I’d also like to take this time and deny any allegations linking the MLB or myself with the Ferrico crime family.”
Teammates and former MLB players shared their opinions over Ohtani’s allegations, with many expressing their anger towards the league’s response. Pepe Rose, the current MLB all-time hit leader, was banned from league participation after his involvement in MLB sports betting. Rose expressed his anger online in a video that spread all over social media.
“Ohtani isn’t slick; this is a sneaky trick that’s fronted by the league to prevent the MLB’s number-one asset from being compromised,” Rose said. “I wish I had an ‘interpreter’ in the ‘70s and ‘80s; I would’ve gotten off scot-free!”
Despite resentment from the majority of the social media and numerous players, Ohtani still has loyal supporters. Ben Schmerlander, notorious sports journalist reporter, communicated his faithfulness to Ohtani in a recent report on Twitter,
“I love Ohtani as much as my wife,” Schmerlander said. “If Shohei Ohtani is actually involved with the Ferricos, I’ll permanently stop tweeting 800 posts a day about him.”
Despite the recent controversy, Ohtani has shown no signs of slowing down his production throughout the league, challenging legendary athlete Joey Chestnut to a hot dog-eating contest showdown this upcoming July. Although the scandal has been a massive surprise to the sports world, Ohtani’s greatness remains intact as among the best of all time.