Trinitonian

Trinity says goodbye to the Southern Collegiate Athletic Conference

The athletic department sacks SCAC

Bicholas Bhen, Sports Reporter • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here https://trinitonian.com/category/special-sections/ The SCAC, better known as the Southern Collegiate...

There’s a new Swashbuckler on campus

Avast ye! I am making big changes after my ascent to Swashbuckler captaincy

Bolin Bouston, Opinion Colunist • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. When I was named a captain of Swashbucklers for the upcoming school year last week, I knew it...

Anonymous Instagram accounts unmasked

Unveiling the masterminds behind Trinity’s most notorious Instagram pages

Bate Blein, Intern • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. Anonymous Instagram accounts that use school names and logos have been trending over the past...

Meet Queenie, nacho average mascot

LeeRoy’s drag fursona reintroduces herself to campus, spices up Trinity tradition

Babby Backson, Arts & Entertainment Reporter • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. We all know LeeRoy as Trinity’s friendly neighborhood tiger-man, who says a tiger can’t change...

Murchison Tower levels up

A look into former president Handy Danderson’s secret gaming career

Bamira Burino, Arts & Entertainment Reporter • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. Have you ever noticed the LED lights illuminating the Murchison Tower late at night? Or maybe...

“The Beast” brightens the skies of Trinity

Banessa "The Beast" Beastly’s inauguration events motivate new funding to security and the arts

Barker Barent, Arts & Entertainment Reporter • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. Trinity recently welcomed its newest president, Banessa “The Beast” Beastly, with an elaborate...

Why “Velma” is the greatest show of all time

Finally, the animation industry provides us with a true diamond in the rough

Bom Bighe, Arts & Entertainment Columnist • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. The realm of animation is one of complete and utter garbage. While there are exceptions (“Cars...

Theta Theta Veta: Trinity’s newest fraternity goes live

The new Greek organization that promises fame, fortune, and plenty of content

Bangelina B'Elia, Arts & Entertainment Editor • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. Greek life is once again expanding this semester, welcoming its newest co-ed fraternity with open...

Go to class sick

University pushes for all students to overcome ailments and become better individuals

Boshua Bitra, News Reporter • March 30, 2023

This piece is entirely satirical. Read the rest of our April Fool’s edition, the Trinibonian, here. Trinity University announced a groundbreaking joint initiative by the Student Government Association...

Polyamory and counterhegemonic ideas about love and sex

How learning about polyamory can improve your own intimate relationships

Shivani Selladurai, Opinion Columnist • February 9, 2023

Back when I was on dating apps, I would of course participate in doomswiping for hours trying to find the perfect (or at least redeemable) match compared to the onslaught of people that didn’t make the...

I went on 7 dates in 7 days

One date per day: Seven spots around San Antonio with seven different people

Alejandra Gerlach, Managing Editor • February 9, 2023

Valentine’s Day is a chance to celebrate love — both romantic and platonic. However, it can be hard to find a good date spot if you aren’t familiar with San Antonio. So if you’re looking for a...

T4T relationships give trans students hope for the future

A celebration of shared transgender experience creates a profound romantic bond

Logan Crews, Editor-in-Chief • February 9, 2023

I went on my first Tinder date in the summer of 2020, just as coffee shops were opening up for socially-distanced seating. After waiting 20 minutes, I saw my date had unadded me on Tinder and evidently...